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There really is nothing you can say or do when someone has a miscarriage to make it better. It is a time of tremendous loss and grief. The best thing you can offer is love and support.
Now as someone who has gone through a miscarriage myself I would like to share some of the thoughtful things that meant a lot to me while working through my grief and other recommendations for ways you can help and support those you love.
- What does mom need to physically recover?
- How can you support her emotionally?
- Get premade miscarriage care packages.
Table of Contents
What Do Families of Loss Need?
If you have a friend, sister, or someone close to you experience a pregnancy loss no matter when it has occurred they are going to need some love and support. It may be hard for them to tell you exactly what they need at that time as they are most likely trying to work through a lot of emotions. As someone who had been down that road I would like to offer some curated advice to help you find positive ways to support those that you love.
They need to hear that you love them and you are there for them. Honestly I thinking also hearing from people that they knew there was nothing they could do to make it better was a little comforting. Just knowing they were there, they loved me, and they would be there to talk if I needed it was just what I needed.
Additional support outside of that through your time, meals, and gifts can be very helpful in supporting families going through loss. Below I have compiled an extensive list of things that you can put together to make the best miscarriage care package. If that is not your thing then I also have a list of prepackaged gift ideas as well. No matter what you choose I’m sure it will be well received. Really it’s the thought that counts.
Free Gifts or Gifts of Your Time
Making a meal or buying a premade meal to warm up in the oven can be a huge way to support someone going through a loss. I know for me the last thing I wanted to worry about was what am I going to feed my children for dinner.
Thank goodness I had multiple friends that made meals for me over the week. It often made great leftovers for lunch the next day as well. Not only did my kids need good meals, but so did I.
Offer to take their children off their hands. Many parents who are suffering a loss after having children have little time to process the grief together. They are often trading off taking care of their own kids while they process their grief alone.
It can be a huge help to care for their children so they can have time to process the loss together.
Stop by to serve. This can be announced or unannounced. Really read the room on this one. Not everyone will want you to stop by unannounced. However, my family stopped by on multiple occasions to just check in. They stopped to visit with me, washed some of my dishes, etc and that was such a blessing.
Bring some flowers. I know not everyone loves flowers, but they honestly bring in a little life. The beautiful green and colors can lift your spirits just a little. I was very appreciative of the beautiful flowers that filled my home while I was feeling so dark and dead inside.
Gifts for Moms Physical Recovery
Lets not forget that will a miscarriage at any stage of pregnancy does require a labor like experience. This means that physically she is also going through something very difficult. No matter if it is happening on it’s own, medically induced, or a surgical procedure she needs to ensure she takes care of her own physical healing.
Hydration is going to be really important during this time. Staying hydrated will improve overall physical outcomes. Having a cold or hot beverage nearby is going to be the encouragement needed to stay hydrated when that is probably the last thing on your mind.
Honey Pot is my new favorite pad after my own miscarriage. I bought them on a whim shortly after learning of my miscarriage knowing I was going to need some pads. (I am an avid menstrual cup user so I haven’t used pads in a long while).
Anyway I was thoroughly surprised with this herbal infused pads and found them to be made of safe ingredients, soothing for my perineum, and very absorbent. I don’t know if I could use another brand now that I’ve tried these.
Red Raspberry leaf tea is full of important vitamins and nutrients to support your recovery. It is also full of antioxidants to help combat inflammation.
It is believed that Raspberry leaf tea can strengthen the uterus and help with menstrual symptoms. It can be a great way to hydrate and recover after miscarriage.
If you have had a late pregnancy miscarriage you will most likely have to deliver your baby. It can be very difficult. You will physically need to heal and recover just as you would a normal birth.
This postpartum recovery kit comes with all the essentials that you need to heal from the delivery itself.
Cramping after a miscarriage is extremely common. Having a menstrual heating pad could be a huge aid in relieving the painful cramping.
It is very lightweight and compact. It heats up quickly to offer fast relief and can be easily slipped on under your clothing for a seamless fit.
Gifts to Support Emotional Healing
This great devotional was written by a mother of multiple losses. Kathe Wunnenberg has had three miscarriages and grieved the loss of her infant son.
This daily devotional includes 31 days of devotions including scriptures, journaling, and questions to encourage healing.
Walk through this journal one day at a time to find healing in a small way every day.
This beautiful book was also written by a mother of loss. She looks at the comfort that came be found in the book of Psalms.
This devotional will help you feel Gods love for you during this time of hardship and loss. For many this may be a time that could be difficult to feel close to God and his love, but this devotional will open up your eyes and your heart to how God can comfort you through the loss.
This beautiful mug will be great to drink your red raspberry leaf tea to support your recovery through this difficult time. I think it is also a great reminder that you are part of a strong tribe of women that have walked where you are walking and you are not alone.
It is a silent ode to the beautiful life you created and the strength of the body that carried that child for whatever amount of time you carried it.
With every loss I believe you should take the time to process your thoughts and feelings. A journal can be a great way to get out those feelings and emotions in a healthy way.
I love promptly journals and this journal is just as good as all the rest. It gives you helpful prompts from licensed therapists to help you work through your loss and grief on your own. What a great way to honor and remember your baby, your strength, and resilience.
A solid pajama set is a must. Honestly after something like this I would be surprised if you changed your clothes for a few days or even showered. Grief looks different on everyone of course, but you may just want to stay at home and process that grief in your own way.
A beautiful put together matching pajama set gives you the comfort that you need while still feeling a little put together.
To go along with your comfortable pajamas a nice pair of slippers is the perfect addition. I love these because they can smile for you as you work through your loss.
No pressure right? Cozy up, get your tea, and your journal and you are all set. Or you can just watch murder shows on Netflix to numb your grief. Whatever you gotta do mama.
A great way to honor your baby and your body for carrying this sweet soul is with a personalized piece of jewelry. I personally chose to get a simple ring that I can wear everyday as a small way to remember him. It is a citrine ring in honor of the month that I lost him.
Now not every mom will choose to name their baby, but if you do, a personalized necklace, bracelet, or ring could be a great way to always keep that baby with you.
Prepackaged Miscarriage Care Package
If putting together your own personalized miscarriage care package is too much for you then there are also some great companies out there doing it so you don’t have to. These packages are thoughtfully made to support mom and dad through their healing journey in positive ways.
This box from Laurel box is one that can help to commemorate the birth with a beautiful pieced of jewelry to remember that child. You can choose from a raw cut birthstone, infinite necklace, forget me not necklace, or initial necklace with a beautiful jewelry bowel to hold it when needed. Priced at just $45.00.
These boxes are made to support women through all types of losses. They have several expertly curated miscarriage and loss boxes that you can find one that will truly fit the needs of your dearest loved one.
This five piece set not only takes care of mom’s physical needs, but helps walk you through the emotional healing as well. It comes with a beautiful rose quartz heart to aid in the healing of your heart.
This beautiful gift box is full of thoughtful gifts to help any mother walk through the grief and loss of miscarriage. With personalization options to add to this box you can determine what you think she might need most.
Not everyone will grieve the same way, but hopefully we have given you a few great ideas to help you or those you love grieve in a healthy way.
There isn’t anything that can take away the pain that comes with pregnancy loss. It may hit you at the most unexpected of times, but these gifts can help comfort you through the most difficult days. Whether it is you experiencing the loss or someone you love I hope that these little thoughtful gifts will ease some of the pain and lift the burden that you carry. No matter when you experienced your loss you are a mother, your baby does matter, and you can overcome this. You are not alone, and you are loved.
Jess is a registered nurse with over 6+ years of critical care experience for patients young and old and is the mother of two small children. After having her own children she felt inspired to provide mothers with real actionable guidance and education to make informed decisions throughout their pregnancy and postpartum experience.