What Are Your Options With An Early Miscarriage?

What Causes Miscarriage in Early Pregnancy?

There are a variety of causes when it comes to miscarriage and most likely you won’t know exactly what caused your early miscarriage. When you think about the number of things that have to happen to make a healthy baby it is an absolute miracle that we see success so often. One of the biggest reasons for miscarriage in early pregnancy is due to chromosomal abnormalities, that accounts for about 50%-75% of miscarriages.

A sperm cell carries a set of chromosomes and it meets the egg which has a set of chromosomes. If either has too few or two many chromosomes that can cause disaster when things start multiplying. Even if you do have the right number of chromosomes in each, just the act of cells multiplying and dividing several times in that early process can lead to abnormalities that can lead to miscarriage.

And guess what?? You have no control over that and it’s 100% not your fault! Most chromosomal abnormalities happen completely by chance.

Other Causes of Miscarriage

So what about that other 25-50% of miscarriages? It’s not completely clear, but it can be due to chronic health conditions, issues within the reproductive system, or issues within the regulation of your hormones.

• Uncontrolled diabetes: can effect the growth of the fetus especially in the early weeks of pregnancy. If you as the mother have high glucose levels in the blood it passes to your baby, which can lead to birth defects and higher incidence of miscarriage.
• Smoking, Drugs, or Alcohol Use: All of these behaviors can significantly increase the risk of miscarriage and birth defects.
• Infections: There is some research that suggest that general infection could increase the risk of miscarriage, but it is not definitive and therefore is not routinely screened in newly pregnant women.
• Endocrine Dysfunction: Failure of the body’s hormone functions to maintain the pregnancy such as progesterone levels, thyroid levels, Hcg levels, and other necessary hormones to maintain a healthy pregnancy can lead to a miscarriage.
• Exposure to Environmental Toxins: Some toxic chemical exposures can lead to miscarriages as studies have shown higher incidence of miscarriage around areas of higher environmental toxin exposure.
• Obesity: How obesity is linked to higher miscarriage rates is not entirely clear, but it con contribute to early pregnancy loss due to many possible factors.

What Doesn’t Cause Miscarriage

It’s normal for women to blame themselves when a pregnancy ends. I have cared for so many women in that very moment, and I have been there myself. We have a tendency to blame ourselves, but really it’s not our fault. It is not because we worked out too hard, or drank that drink when we didn’t know we were pregnant, we tripped and fell, or got in that argument, or had sex, or whatever other reason you can come up with. It was none of those things. So if this is you. Stop blaming yourself. You did nothing wrong. It was a matter of chance.

I know that is a lot harder to stop blaming yourself if you have had multiple miscarriages, but most of the time it was just a random event that is no one’s fault. If you have experienced multiple miscarriages it is best to speak with your provider and consider further testing to determine if there is another factor leading to your recurrent losses.

What Does an Early Miscarriage Look Like?

Now an early miscarriage is not going to look the same for everyone. Just remember that no matter how early or late your miscarriage was it is of value. Do not devalue your situation, because you believe it is less than someone else’s experience. Your grief and your loss matters and you should process it however you need to.

Chemical Pregnancy: Due to the advancement of our testing many women can test as early as 3-5 days before their missed period and get an accurate result. Although the egg may fertilize typically something happens soon after implantation and you will likely bleed sometime around your period so some women never even realize they had a positive pregnancy. Your period may just seem to be a few days late or a little heavier than normal. Most of these pregnancy losses are due to chromosomal abnormalities.

Blighted Ovum: You can learn all about blighted ovums in depth in our our article here. This is when an egg is fertilized and implanted. However it is an anembryonic pregnancy because an empty embryonic sac develops. This means the pregnancy will end in miscarriage.

Silent/Missed Miscarriage: This is the case when the baby has stopped developing but there has been no signs of miscarriage (such as cramping or bleeding). The mother may notice a decrease in pregnancy symptoms, but often she is unaware the pregnancy is lost until an ultrasound is done. It can be a complete shock for many mothers.

Threatened Miscarriage: This is when there is vaginal bleeding and cramping, but there is still a chance you may go on to have a healthy pregnancy. It is best to be evaluated by your medical provider to determine your risks and what you can do. There are many normal reasons for bleeding in early pregnancy.

Incomplete Miscarriage: In this case your body will have signs of cramping, bleeding, and passing of tissue. However, your body will not be able to completely clear all the tissue from the womb.

Complete Miscarriage: You will have severe, heavy vaginal bleeding, cramping, and passage of tissue. Your body is able to completely pass all the pregnancy tissue on it’s own.

What Options Do I Have When I Learn I am Having a Miscarriage?

No matter your situation you have options. If you feel that your provider is not giving you options then you need to speak up and maybe consider going to another provider. I felt so blessed to find a provider during my time of loss that spent a good amount of time with me helping me understand that this wasn’t my fault and walked me through all the options.

He did also give me his professional opinion, but was very verbal about supporting whatever decision I felt was best for me and my situation.

Check out this video that thoroughly discusses the typical options in detail. It could be great if you want a very realistic understanding of what to expect. Be prepared to hear very straight forward and descriptive language.

Expectant Management

Allowing your body to recognize that the pregnancy has stopped and allowing it to take matters into it’s own hands may be the right choice for some. Usually within 1-4 weeks your body will realize that the pregnancy is no longer viable and will naturally pass it on it’s own. You should expect to have some severe cramping/abdominal pain, bleeding, and passing of tissue. It will be like a labor experience in some ways.

I would recommend that you have someone with you when this occurs incase you loose a significant amount of blood. This could lead to you becoming light headed or passing out. You may still need a medical procedure if the tissue does not completely pass on it’s own. Make sure you follow up with your medical provider to ensure that you do not have long term complications from retained materials in the uterus.

This can be a great option that is very natural and affordable. However, it can be very challenging to manage all the feelings of loss as it can feel like things are out of your control and can take a considerable amount of time. This is something that you have to consider and make the decision that is best for you.

Medication Managment

Another option is giving your body a medication that can assist in passing the pregnancy on it’s own. These medications can be given in your clinic or taken at home. It often takes effect quickly so you can have more control of the timing. it will induce a labor experience- including intense cramping, bleeding, and passing of tissue. This can be quite intense.

I have spoken with many women that have chosen this option. I know personally that it was very traumatic for some. You will see a large passage of tissue and that can in itself be quite traumatic. Many also stated they were not prepared for the amount of blood that they passed.

Again if this is your choice please do not do this alone. Make sure that someone will be home with you. If you have young children you may want them to be with someone else at the time as it can also be quite traumatic and confusing for them. If it does not all pass on it’s own you may still need additional medical management.

Surgical Management

Your third option is to choose a D&C or a surgical procedure that will clean out the contents of your uterus while you are under anesthesia. Now any surgery comes with risks and you will want to throughly discuss those with your medical provider, but it can be a great option for someone who is looking to move forward without the trauma of seeing the tissues passed.

It does require some physical recovery but your recovery will look much like a normal period. Just remember if you choose this option you will still need emotional support and will need to prioritize your own mental recovery surrounding the miscarriage.

Tips for Finding Hope and Healing in Miscarriage

How you choose to find hope in this time will vary. What works for some will not work for all. I have decided to share a few tips of what worked for me, and helped me to find peace and hope in this challenging time.

1. Share the news with someone you trust: I found that talking with people I trusted about the loss was very therapeutic for me. It helped me to get a better grasp of what happened, and process it mentally. Many of the women I reached out to had either also experienced miscarriage (they shared advice and tips) or just offered pure love and support. It’s amazing what a good hug, “I love you, I’m here for you,” and some flowers can do for the soul.
2. Let people serve you. Many people offered to help in many ways. One big help was bringing meals for me and my family. I appreciated that I didn’t have to think about cooking, because some days I could barely get out of my bed. Other days I deep cleaned my house to process the grief. I just never really knew how I was going to need to process things that day.
3. Lean in to your spirituality. I know for me my spirituality and my connection with God is very meaningful to me. I know that is not the case for everyone, but finding meaning through the loss was an important part of my healing. My church doesn’t have a particular stance or teaching regarding early miscarriage, but reading through some scriptural passages and through prayer I was able to find some clarity that brought so much peace and acceptance.
4. Let your spouse grieve in their own way. How your partner grieves may be very different than you. I found that my partner tried to stay very strong for me and processed his grief very quietly. It worked for him and I realized it was okay that it looked differently than mine. It didn’t mean it hurt him any less. I tried to check in with him frequently so he felt open to process it as well.
5. Don’t worry about work. I was so worried about work. This was the busiest time of our year. How could I afford to take off so much time. The truth of the matter is. Work will be fine. You need to take the time to heal physically and mentally. They were able to handle the load without me and your work will be too.
6. Journal or write down your experience. I have found that writing and talking about my experience has truly helped me process and heal. You don’t have to share it on a public forum, but putting all your feelings and emotions down on paper can be very therapeutic.
7. It’s okay to change your mind. I had decided I wanted to have a very natural pregnancy and was working with a midwife. When I found out I was miscarrying I originally thought of course I’ll just let it happen naturally. After a few days I realized this was not the right choice for me. I was so worried about it happening when I was at work or out with my kids. Waiting for it to happen was mentally excruciating to me. I knew I needed to move it along so that I could mentally move on and process the loss. I chose to have a D&C and that was the best decision for me.
8. Honor that child in a special way. I chose to buy a piece of jewelry that I can wear everyday to remember that special child. It is a small personal reminder I can carry with me always. I want to remember the strength and courage I had, the short bond that we had formed, and honor their time in my womb.

I hope these ideas can be helpful in your healing. Remember there is no right or wrong way to heal. Take the time that you need and you will find peace and healing.

How Likely am I to Have a Healthy Pregnancy in the Future?

You are very likely to go on to have a perfectly healthy pregnancy after miscarriage. According to the American Pregnancy Association about 85% of women will have a healthy pregnancy after miscarriage and about 75% will have a healthy pregnancy after more than one loss.

I would encourage you to take simple healthy steps to improve your mental, emotional, and physical health before you try again, but that is just so that you can feel ready and prepared to take on pregnancy. Loss takes a toll on us in so many ways. Talk with your partner and work together to make changes to ensure you are both ready to continue to grow your family.

When Can I Start Trying for My Next Pregnancy?

You may get conflicting advice about this, but from multiple providers I have received the same answer: “As soon as you feel ready.” There is no required wait time, and there have actually been limited studies that suggest you may have better pregnancy outcomes the sooner you get pregnant after loss. This doesn’t suggest you need to get pregnant right away in order to have success, but that perhaps within the next 6 months you are likely to have greater success than 2 years from now. Again there is limited data to support this as fact.

Some suggest waiting for one normal menstrual cycle before trying again if you feel mentally and emotionally ready. Again take the time that you need to properly heal. Miscarriage is a loss and it does take some time to properly grieve that loss.

Final Thoughts

Although being a part of the miscarriage club is no fun, remember you are not alone. If you have had a pregnancy loss at any stage in your pregnancy you are joining a group of other women who have been where you are. Don’t be afraid to reach out and talk with other women can truly empathize with you. They can be a great resource for love and support at this time as you try to navigate your options.

Hope and healing are around the corner and I hope that you can take the time to heal and continue on the road to growing your family however that looks for you. I am here for you and will always be an ear to listen if you need it. Feel free to comment or reach out through email. You are a strong and amazing mother and we wish for you the family of your dreams.